People talk to me about my body

As I'm getting out of my Jeep in the YMCA parking garage yesterday, I notice a man I don't know walking toward me, looking at me with an unpleasant, even hostile look on his face. I'm alert, a little rattled, and confused because he's looking right at me, but initially I think it has something [...]

Good, good man

He was the first one on Beulah or anywhere in this neighborhood I ever talked to. I came here white-fearful. But I came with a poker face, trying to be far more woke than I felt on the inside, trying to get my body to match what I considered to be my educated deconstructing mind. [...]

Glimpses

Every time I drive by this past week or so, they're gutting these two houses further, a truck pulling an open trailer full of pieces parked in the street. The doors and windows are gone, their frames lifted off the foundation and onto cinder blocks. They'll move them maybe, somewhere outside our neighborhood. These are, [...]

What is this place?

They say that you can never go back home. I used to think this was a certain cruelty, as if leaving somehow was always a betrayal, one that got you banned or held at arm's length or just not privy to the important things, the inside things that matter most. To be away with your [...]

Getting honest

"Damage is done... by the insistence on a fantasy version of heterosexual marriage as the solitary ideal, when the facts of the situation are that an enormous number of 'sanctioned' unions are a framework for violence and human destructiveness on a disturbing scale: sexual union is not delivered from moral danger and ambiguity by satisfying [...]

In which I tell him, and I quote: “Now, I’m not nearly as gorgeous as you, but I do make a mean stack of pancakes.”

Maybe we don't have to talk (too much) about why I had a dating app on my phone. Suffice to say, it was complicated, a weird collaboration between an observation, a few anxieties, and my aging ovaries. Let me explain. The observation: At Christmas, all my siblings are meaningfully paired off with significant others, now [...]

The work that is yours to do

I was writing to you yesterday, the post about wedding music, and in the aftermath, honestly battling with myself over it - not because I regret anything I said, and not because I've changed my mind, or any of that. More, it's that as time goes by, and maybe as I get older, or the [...]